I quit my job before the first day. It’s true. I got hired at Anthropologie and then I quit 20 minutes before I was supposed to come in for my first day.
With an interest in fashion, I thought it’d be cool to start pursuing a little fashion career and start working in retail. As soon as I thought of it, I fell absolutely in love with it. During this “falling in love” phase, I become very excited and very optimistic. I became too optimistic, so I ignored all of the negatives that would later face with me. Negatives such as working long hours, the idea of working (I personally hate working, at least for other people), dealing with annoying customers, etc. I never fully considered these negatives, nor how I would feel if these negatives were to come up to me. All I could think about is the employee discount, being surrounded in pretty clothes, and working in a high-end fashion mall.
The night before, I started getting depressed at the fact that I have to work an 8 hour shift tomorrow at a new workplace at 7 in the morning. I started second guessing myself. This was when those “negatives” hit me. After I woke up and my amazing boyfriend prepared me a “first day of work” breakfast and lunch, I plugged in the mall to my GPS and was on my way. Well, it turns out that I plugged the wrong mall into my GPS and it was giving me the wrong directions. When I finally realized it, I knew I was going to be late. Between the nerves and all of those negatives, it hit me like a rock and I started stressing out. I gave up on going to work, and I parked my car at this senior living development. It was 7:10 in the morning and I was screaming and crying in my car. Not because I was late or lost (although it probably had something to do with it), but because I came to a revelation that accepting this job was a huge mistake and I thought that something was seriously wrong with me.
Something was seriously wrong with me: I was a quitter.
I only thought that thought for a second. Then, I thought “hey, this is something I can learn and grow from”. So, I did.
I realized that when I take an interest to something and I actually do it, I lose that interest immediately and completely after doing it. I’ve come to the conclusion that I fall in love too quickly. I am blinded by the inspiring and beautiful positives, and I ignore the negatives and how they would make me feel. I ignore the fact that I would face them. No matter what relationship, career, job, or hobby you pursue, there will always be negatives. It’s up to us to either make sure we really enjoy what is we want to do or make sure the positives overcome the negatives. They go pretty much hand in hand with each other. In my case, I was infatuated with the glamour of working at a pretty retail store.
Have good reasons for pursuing anything. If you don’t have good reasons, then don’t pursue it. You will make yourself miserable. If you do, then think about the negatives over and over again. Remember that the positives must truly outweigh the negatives.
Thank you, universe, for letting me grow from yet another stupid mistake I’ve made.